Status Report

It's 2 o'clock in the morning and I can't sleep. I haven't been able to sleep for the past two weeks.  For the last couple of nights, it's because of restless legs - if the CIA could do it, they'd use it at Gitmo.  My muscles and sinews are being played like the harpsichord and it's damned awful.

Of course,  sleeping problems could come from my sudden and drastic change in living quarters. My mom and I are living with my sister Karen, now. My sisters and I had been thinking for quite a while that our dad was more of a hindrance than a help to mom's healing. They, um, have some issues.  So when she was in the hospital for pneumonia the last time - oh, did I mention she went back into the hospital?

 To review: she had bilateral pneumonia in July and spent basically the whole month in a hospital of one form or another. When she came home, she was doing really well, but after a week of weird neurological events that no one can seem to explain, she started going downhill.  My dad refused to accept her frailty, state of being, and general illness, and instead demanded that she get up, do chores, and threatened to get rid of her wheelchair. Anyway, she got to the point one Saturday that I took her to the ER, who did a CT scan showing she had pneumonia again, but discharged her saying, essentially, there's nothing wrong with her. We followed up with one of her docs and she was admitted to the hospital, where she stayed for 5 days. She came home Saturday and on Sunday I packed both of us up and drove to Karen's. It's across the street from Sabino Canyon, so it's gorgeous and peaceful. But small. But not like a Tardis. So Mom's on a hospital bed in the living room and I'm on a mattress squeezed between boxes in the loft Karen's using for  storage. It's atop a tight spiral staircase and a bit of a risk to traverse when you're tired or not paying attention.

My beautiful, blessed dog is staying at my other sister's, Amy, house. No room for her here; besides I'd have to get up at 5 and stay up to walk her. That's no good. Especially since I've had a rat-nasty flu for the past two weeks. TWO WEEKS! I haven't eaten anything in a good week-and-a-half, which, on a bright side has helped me lose some weight. Did I also mention that I've gained like 30 or 40lb.s? I'm getting cellulite on the front of my legs. THE FRONT!!!Despite what you might expect, hospital cafetrias do not have healthy food: a sad&measly salad bar, pizza, fries, hot dogs, vending machines full of chocolate. A rolling stone may carry no moss, but god, once I started putting on weight, it just padded it on.

So this is my new life. Living in a loft on a mattress, without my dog. Haven't seen anyone besides my family or medical professionals since June. I am exhausted. I'm chubby. My legs are restless. My head hurts. And damn it, I need a good snog. One day I will feel better, and one day I will have a social life. Just not right now.